Breaking Up

I just ended a long relationship. Sixteen years. We went through a lot together, but in the end, I had to end it.


No one understands the complexity involved in ending a relationship. In this case, our problems went beyond simple communication. Though, to be honest, if I would have to testify, that would be the number one cause for the dissolution of the relationship. I couldn’t talk anymore. I spent most of my time waiting in silence. And then, when I could finally get a decent conversation, it would just fail. It ended in silence.

Even texting was useless.

It wasn’t always this way. In the beginning, things were wonderful. Conversations went uninterrupted. There were great benefits. Even when I was off roaming somewhere alone, I always could reach out and talk to someone.

Maybe it was the kids. It used to be just the two of us, and then suddenly, all these new people entered the conversations. It became overwhelming. Everyone was fighting for themselves and no one ever got what they wanted. We fought over time. We counted the minutes.

It wasn’t easy to leave. You tried to get me to stay. But this time I knew better than to believe your entreaties.

“It will be better.”

“Here’s a gift.”

“Come back. I miss you.”

Empty words. Empty promises. Sixteen years had taught me that.

I can’t say I wasn’t warned. People told me to leave. Years ago, when things started getting bad. They saw the abrupt conversations. The yelling into the phone. The constant aggravation. The dilated sighs.

I stayed for the wrong reasons. We had some things in common. Like Jack Bauer. And a love of fast things. We had great plans that kept changing. We went from friends, to family, to framily, to what we have now: nothing.

Change is not easy, that’s for sure. Even when all signs point to its necessity, making that initial leap is difficult. After all, we had a contract that we had entered into – a contract based on mutual needs and wants. I always held up my end, and every two years or so, I promised to stay with you.

No more.

But inasmuch as I am sad at this ending, I can’t help feeling excitement at the new beginning waiting at my fingertips. I’m happy. Finally. The channels are clear. The signals no longer mixed. The bar has been raised and I decided that I was worth more than what I was getting.

I don’t think we can stay friends. There is too much baggage there and I am moving on to better things.

So screw you, Sprint. You had your chance.

I’m going with AT&T.





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10 replies

  1. wow… I’m about to do the same thing after 20 years. AT&T to T-mobile.

  2. Holy shit I laughed SO hard at this! Thank you I really needed that. Love you beans! Btw I now I have free calls to the states. When can I call you? All the time? Sweet. 

    Sent from Cellcom email services

  3. LOVED this! Passed it all around the office and they all loved it too! 🙂

  4. ALWAYS been with AT&T…ALWAYS! Forty years working for Them(ME)…Three and a half more after retirement….And yes, it wasn’t always a positive experience…but, like LIFE…I CHOSE to make it work and reap the rewards of commitment….$1.84 per share per year in dividends X a sh*tload of shares= :)…and, yes I own Verison stock too 🙂

  5. $1.84 per share/per year dividend times a sh*tload of shares equals one happy camper !

  6. I read all the way to the end. And I am cracking up! Btw….thanks for letting me know AT&T is cheating on me!

  7. That was an insensitive post. For people who have broken up, you triggered a huge range of difficult emotions. Breaking up is no joking matter, no matter how creative you are.

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